Monday, 14 July 2008

Life Coaching - session 1

Firstly, and I think most importantly I really like her. I didn’t “take” to my counsellor as quickly last year – she was an acquired taste! I think it is important that you “get on” with people like this seeing as you are hoping to get a lot of good advice and guidance from them.

Today we started with all the form filling in etc, one of which was a bit of a “How stressed out are you?” questionnaire. I got 23 out of 40. 5 is “normal”. Imagine if I had filled it in a couple of months ago!! I think I would have been off the scale then!

We then had a short discussion about the background to why I was there, which made me cry (again!!). We also discussed things like who I have in my life to support me etc so she knows what’s bugging me and who I can talk to about it.

She said what happens a lot (and I believe this is what has happened to me) is people teeter on the edge of having a complete burn out and then pull themselves away from it, only to get close to the edge again, then pull back, then get close to the edge etc until finally you drop off and completely burn out. I think I have taken a step back from the edge, but as she said today it’s obvious I am still showing signs of stress I will end up teetering again if I don’t do something to change it. The most important thing I think she said here is I can find ways to deal with this, even if the other people don’t change (although she thinks they should of course!).

So, I will be seeing her for 8 weeks and we will find lots of coping strategies for me to deal with it all. I’m really confident that this will work for me, even after just one hour! I’m really up for it to be honest. I’ll do anything to get back to being happy and confident, and not just on the face of it like I am now.

I have homework to do too. A lot of common sense things like:

  • Eat 2 bananas a day, or take potassium supplements.

This should help with the constant headaches I seem to be getting. I need to check this out with my docs though – I don’t like to take supplements without finding out their interaction with other drugs/hormones etc. I’ll munch a banana or two in the meantime though if it helps!

  • Drink plenty of water (2 litres a day) and keep eating healthily

Obvious really!

  • Do some exercise

Pleased to see the swimming over at the caravan site will help here – another reason buying that was is such a good idea!

  • Interract with nature

She was quick to point out this didn’t mean tree hugging!! I am just to take notice of my environment, and see all the lovely things there are as I wander about (focus on the positive). That’ll be easy cos I kind of do that already – a throwback from counselling.

  • Laugh

Not something I have been doing a lot of! Time to get smiling and watching something funny on tv I think.

  • Do kind things for people

She said there has been some research into this, and not only do you make the recipient feel better – it raises your serotonin levels too. I’m sure I won’t find this too difficult. In fact I let quite a few cars out on the drive back...

  • Do 3 nice things for myself each week

I like this one a lot That should be easy. Like she said it can be something small like having a long bath, or treating yourself to something nice for lunch (healthy of course!). I am sure I will be able to do this no problem!! I might go shopping again – I could do with a new laptop haha!

So that’s my homework. Just one other thing I have to note down 3 examples of times when I have negative feelings that cause me to feel I am not confident at work. That should be a doddle too! Then we can work on coping strategies to deal with them.

I think that is about it. It all seems to be common sense really, but it already feels good just to turn the focus of my mind onto more positive things. I was already trying to do this, but this will make it much easier I am sure.

2 comments:

Me said...

I really like those tips!

They just seem so obvious - but as I am getting so stuck back into my working life that I am stopping doing all the little things just for me (the things I did when I was a lady of leisure [so to speak]!).

So I have decided to note down your little steps and put them into practice in my own little life. I have had my banana for the day so I will start by getting a glass of water - i really don't drink enough. Tomorrow I will go out for a walk and enjoy the outdoors (if it doesn't rain).

Glad to hear your mammo was all good. I have been keeping half an eye on your pooh-pants work thing and my heart goes out to you to have to put up with such c**p.

Take care.
Dawnxx

Anji said...

I'm noting down the advice too, though I already do most of it. I read somewhere on line that exercise is a mood booster and you can feel a difference after only 10 minutes!

It's good you like your counsellor.